Unlearn Patriarchy: Read The Will to Change

Men cannot change if there are no blueprints for change. Men cannot love if they are not taught the art of loving.

It is not true that men are unwilling to change. It is true that many men are afraid to change. Indeed, the masses of men have not even begun to look at how patriarchy keeps them from knowing themselves, from being in touch with their feelings, and from loving.

“To know love, men must be able to let go of the will to dominate. They must be able to choose life over death. They must be willing to change.”

– bell hooks

In the fight to end patriarchy across the globe and its destabilizing conditions by way of our bodies, our land, and our systems, we are seeking solidarity, participation, and collaboration from men everywhere so that we can finally put an immediate end to gender-based violence and the destruction of the planet.

Patriarchy is a spiritual crisis; It is a violent and life-threatening system where men rule and dominate over women and all other life on earth. It shows up in systemic and personal ways: colonization, war, removing women from the land, sexual assault, violence, homophobia, and transphobia. The most pervasive and yet dismissed impact is on our emotional and mental lives. In the end, patriarchy dehumanizes all people. It removes men from their ability to explore all sides of themselves fully and enforces the gender binary in order to sustain power and dominance over others.

It is another barrier keeping us from creating, collaborating, and transforming the material conditions of our lives together. Patriarchy is colonization in its most brutal and violent form. It has been internalized and perpetuated by all identities and must be addressed in all people, women included.

We are calling for a revolution of values. We need to build a world where people of all genders can belong together. We need male feminists to help protect and nurture a loving world for all of us and future generations.

As feminists, we know people are capable of self-transformation and that change is the seed of life. This is a moment for us to honestly and vulnerably go deep within to delve into our flaws and the ways that patriarchy has kept us from ourselves and each other.

We are not naive; we know it will take work, sacrifice, and undying commitment to shift the conditions of people everywhere. But we know that, at the very least, we need the will to change.

–Abiodun Aderonmu